Meet #MogulMoxie Maven Tanya Stewart, Esq. – an all-around brilliant Alpha woman.
In our interview, Tanya shares her journey to building a business and life she loves – and she tells us all about how she helps Alpha women thrive! So, grab your favorite beverage, settle in and get ready to be inspired by wisdom of Tanya Stewart, Esq. – Alpha Woman Coach.
We know that you, like us, believe in the power of formal and informal education. So, let’s start there. Tell us about your educational background.
“I was educated at all private catholic schools kindergarten through high school. I enjoyed getting my B.S. from University of Illinois, Champaign-Urbana in Engineering-Psychology Pre-Law. From there I was recruited and accepted a full scholarship to earn my J.D. from University of Georgia, School of Law. Extras: Advanced Clinical Certification in Hypnotherapy. Certified Mediator. Court Appointed Guardian Ad Litem (G.A.L).”
“What does all that mean? I’m good at learning and I like it. Law school didn’t teach me anything. Most lawyers won’t tell you that. You learn how to actually do things after you graduate when someone trains you. If you don’t have degrees, seek apprenticeship. It’s probably more useful.”
Seeking apprenticeships and other opportunities takes moxie and some would say ‘ambition.’ Tell us about your relationship with ambition.
“Ambition isn’t a word I used. I was after approval and love and security. Respect. The drive to have those things was my ambition. I have come to understand that the approval and love, priority and security I sought from others could NEVER come before I gave it to myself. My old ambition was therefore a trap. Even the word has a slightly negative connotation, as we tell cautionary tales about the ‘price of ambition’ more than stories about success from ambition.”
“I have freed myself from the old cycle of wanting, struggle and getting and wanting all over again. My drive is now to serve other women like me (Alphas) because freeing them lights me up from the inside out.”
That’s awesome. Tell us about your work at Fearless Focus Coaching.
“I show Alpha Women Entrepreneurs how to stop struggling in their relationships, own their true potential, build their business, and balance it all. I am a Coach of Alphas.”
Very interesting. What does it means to be an Alpha?
“If you are an Alpha, you have spent a lifetime misunderstood. Mostly punished for being too much. Subtly and not-so-subtly asked to turn it down, turn off, want less, do less, and be less. You coast but you still perform better than most.”
We are very familiar with this personality type. 🙂 How do you coach an Alpha?
“Alphas are difficult to coach unless you are also an Alpha. I show Alphas how to be more of who they are. Not through pushing, masculine energy, nor at the cost of love. I teach my Alphas how they can receive help, to love so they can feel safe, to attract and honor a proper mate so they can share love, and to surrender to their Source so they can begin their purpose. The results are better business, confidence, health, and adaptability.”
Love it. Let’s talk finances. What’s been helpful to you in increasing and managing your cashflow?
“As I have grown happier and more peaceful, I have become the most generous I have ever been. I no longer look at clients as the ‘source’ of my income. They are channels that source uses. Because I do not view any one person as my source, I can give freely and release freely. In my giving, I have been blessed many times over.”
“For those who are not as close to this, start by focusing on the avenue you are pursuing for money and allow the idea that there are many other ways money and opportunity can reach you other than what you can see. That will open up some room for the Universe to work for you.”
As you think about your personal and professional life, what have you accomplished, created, or built that makes you most proud?
“It’s not a house or business. I’ve built unshakable certainty and clarity in who I am and who I serve. I am Alpha and leading other Alphas out of struggle is what brings me the most joy. I am in the process of building a safe place for Alphas to learn and grow and be supported. Helping Alphas find right mates, leave mates who are not right with grace, and begin again if needed while building their business. That’s my superpower!”
Having superpowers is something our MogulMoxie® Mavens have in common! On the topic of superpowers, what’s your favorite power word?
“DOMINION. Hell yes! Just say that a couple times, out loud. Dominion. Dominion. Don’t you just FEEL more powerful? We were given dominion and I help people learn to save themselves and then learn to save others, serving according to their gift. I am an Alpha and exercise Dominion over my life and my service. (I am smiling just answering this.) Great question!”
“P.S. IRREVERENT is also very good. I am an Irreverent Energy that breaks Alphas free from whatever is chaining them.”
We’re curious about how you structure your time. Tell us about a typical day in your life.
“I start my days easy and slow. I have a morning ritual of books I read and a daily surrender phrase where I ask God how He wants me to serve this day. I do something creative, and then I choose my three targets for the day. I have a very high level of trust in myself. If I am procrastinating on something, it is often my intuition delaying me from beginning something I should not do or am approaching the wrong way. I let myself want what I want and arrange my life so I do what I like. That choice makes me very focused and efficient when it is work time. That happiness flows into my work, so my Alphas always get my best.”
The deliberate way in which you live your life is inspiring. Have you ever struggled with confidence?
“Confidence and courage come naturally to Alphas, but we are addicted to struggle itself. We learn to define ourselves by our victories against terrible odds, and build our identities around the size of the challenges we face. That means we attract and call out struggle in everything: in relationships, business, families, and ourselves. We get very good at fixing things, controlling things. We are rescuers. I had to learn to overcome rescuing. For Alphas, rescuing others is an excuse to avoid being accountable and showing up for your own purpose. So, my struggle was with struggle itself. I had to learn that struggle is not necessary for success.”
Very insightful. What steps did you take to overcome your attachment to “struggle”?
“I had this quote made to put on the walls of my law firm, ‘Courage is not the absence of fear, but the strength to overcome it.’ The thing that required the most courage in my life was to push the reset button. To call out the truth, that my life was NOT working. I was not happy. The half million dollar home and successful law practice and marriage and miscarriage — NOT WORKING.”
“I scrapped it all. I started over. I shut down my law firm, gave up multiple six figures a year and worked without pay to close the last cases for almost a year. I did a peaceful divorce and took the debt. I moved from my granite topped kitchen into a tiny apartment in a fringe neighborhood and I went after my heart’s desires. I did not get on track for my life by adding more force. I did it by surrendering. Learning how to surrender and when is vital to Alphas. It is not in our nature to surrender, so if we begin on the wrong path, we are happy to die on it.”
“[Alphas] love to be right. We need to be right. I learned how to be wrong so I could start over. I have learned that my choices are how most Alphas are wired and they will repeat my path in one degree or another unless another Alpha intervenes to guide, lead and love her. You can start over and you can be happy.”
That is powerful. As you think about your journey, do you consider yourself unusual, strange, weird or pretty normal?
“I’ve never fit in and grew to be proud of that. I now know that I am an Alpha and not meant to fit in, accept less or settle. Now that I know WHO I AM (an Alpha) and WHO I SERVE (I am a Leader of Alphas), I am happy to be strange! I was born to do exactly what I am doing and I kind of glow when I talk about it. I love myself and that is weird these days too. Shouldn’t be, but it is.”
Self-love is a reflection of God’s love and it’s the most important! Thank you for sharing that wisdom with us. Before we wrap up, let our readers know how they can keep up with you.
“You can join the Alpha Weekly Coaching Newsletter and you’ll get free audio, video and written trainings and coaching posts from me twice a week. I want to improve the life of many more Alphas than I could ever personally work with. My goal is to feed 10,000 Alphas with love and truth, giving you a user’s manual for your life.”
“Are you an Alpha? Join me at www.FearlessFocusCoaching.com and on Twitter @LawyerTanya.”
We hope you’ve been inspired by our interview with #MogulMoxie Maven – Tanya Stewart, Esq.
Here are a couple golden nuggets of wisdom from her interview that you can put into action in your life immediately.
❖ Trust your gut. “If I am procrastinating on something, it is often my intuition delaying me from beginning something I should not do or am approaching the wrong way.”
❖ Recognize that enjoying your work does not detract from its worth. “I had to learn that struggle is not necessary for success.”
Now that you’ve heard from our MogulMoxie® Maven – it’s your turn. What are you going to do differently in your own life or business? We want to hear about it!